The Monkfather

1960’s, Soviet Union. The man was walking towards the dark room, and, after being frisked, was allowed entrance. The door opened seemingly by itself, as if the room was haunted by supernatural forces.


The man sat down in a chair and started talking, as if he was confessing to a priest:


-”18 years ago, we secretly travelled to the Soviet Union, seeking a better life. Me, my baby daughter, and my late wife. I raised my daughter the Russian way. I taught her to keep her honor. But she… went and found a boyfriend. He was a former Red Army soldier. Ever since, she always returned late to my home, but I didn't complain… Few days ago, she returned home with a damaged eye and a broken arm. I asked her what had happened. She told me her boyfriend tried to seduce her but she refused, so he beat her… like an animal. I went to the police and reported the crime. But the judge, what a fool, he let the bastard go… Now he’s walking free on the streets while my daughter suffers in the hospital. Then I said ‘For justice, I must go to Comrade Monke.’”


And he replied, with that heavy, Russian accent:


-”And what do you want me to do?”


-”I want you to find him… and bury him alive!”


-”That… I can not do.”


-”Why not? I’ll give you anything you ask!”


-”When was the last time you invited me to your house for a cup of coffee? Be frank, you never wanted my friendship because you consider me a mobster, a gangster… even though I am Godfather to your only child.”


-”Please! I’ll give you anything you ask!”


-”Look. I’m gonna do you this favor, but I want you to do something for me as well.”


-”And what’s that, Monkfather?”


-”I want you to be a better friend.”


-”Consider it done, Monkfather.”


He then got up. He was dressed in a nice, dark suit with a red bowtie and a red flower on the suit. He also wore a rosary necklace, being a devout Christian. He was an anthropomorphic monkey and he was the leader of SMERSH. He also owned a cat, a white persian fat one, and he loved him very much.


Monke shook his hands with the man, agreeing.


A few days later, the newspapers shocked the citizens of the USSR:


“FORMER RED ARMY SOLDIER FOUND DEAD AFTER BEING BURIED ALIVE, HE SUFFOCATED.”


The man, who’s name was Constantine, saw this and was extremely happy. He went back to Comrade Monke and congratulated him:


-”Thank you for this, Comrade Monke…”


-”No problem. How about you honor your promise too?”


-”What do you mean?”


-”I mean, let’s go to your house for a cup of coffee or some vodka.”


-”Ok. I’m driving!”


Monke and the man exited the SMERSH headquarters.


On their way there, they passed by a grocery store.


-”Stop here! I want to pick up some fruit.”


Monke exited the car and went to buy some fruit.


Suddenly, it felt as if something was off. He saw some men running towards him. He immediately started running to the car but the men reached him and shot him in the back 2 times each simultaneously. They then ran off.


The man exited the car and went to Monke.


-”Monkfather! Are you alright?”


Monke moaned from the pain.


He was immediately taken to the hospital, where he was treated for his wounds.


Monke exited the hospital a few weeks later and went to his apartments in the SMERSH headquarters.


When he was sleeping, he heard a window break. He got up, put his cat in a safe place, and picked up his Makarov pistol.


He eventually saw the men searching the headquarters. He shot one of them, killing him. And jumped on the other, beating him with the pistol until the man surrendered. Monke took off their masks to reveal the men that had shot him.


Turns out they were friends of the former red army soldier Monke had buried alive. Monke shot the other one and killed him.


He then went back to his bed.


The end.